ABSURD & SOPHOMORIC OBSERVATIONS OF LIFE FROM A SEASONED SMART-ASS.  

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WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT FROM REID'S WRITING:

To roll your eyes
-- at his oblivious tendencies.
To smirk
-- at the trajectory of his oblivious behavior man-mind.
To laugh
-- at his propensity to speak the quiet parts of life out loud.
To unwind
-- thanks to the experience & enjoyment of shared humor.

MORE ABOUT REID

WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT FROM REID's writing:

To roll your eyes -- at his oblivious tendencies.

To smirk -- at the trajectory of his stubborn man mind.

To laugh -- at his propensity to speak the quiet parts of life out loud.

To unwind -- thanks to the experience & enjoyment of shared humor.

To roll your eyes
-- at his oblivious tendencies.

To smirk
-- at the trajectory of his oblivious behavior man-mind.

To laugh
-- at his propensity to speak the quiet parts of life out loud.

To unwind
-- thanks to the experience & enjoyment of shared humor.

MORE ABOUT REID

Stephen King wrote that a bad writer can become a good one, but a good writer will never become a great one. I can't begin to tell you how much pressure that took off me, and how many insulting rejection letters I've avoided by taking Mr. King's words to heart.

Still the path from being a bad writer to a good one remains long and winding, and I continue to experience night sweats over the next piece I pen proving that I am the fraud I've always feared myself to be.

Fatalism and dystopia are the two positive driving forces in my writing. Throughout my writing life those forces have kept me on the narrow path of avoiding positivity, cheerfulness and a sunny disposition. After all, if you always expect the worst, you can never be disappointed. When you read my work, just keep in mind it will probably prove to be the low point of your day. That's something to look forward to, right?

A writer for more than 35 years, Reid, like Joyce, has sought to show the mundane and ordinary as unique and extraordinary as a way of justifying a life lived. Unlike Joyce, he has not portrayed that life with either adventure or energy as a driving force, mainly because of the level of effort that would have entailed. 

Now in his 70s, Reid is enjoying a time in life when slowing down and resting frequently is generally accepted as the best that can be expected. His beloved wife and travel companion Carol begs to differ, and that is another area where the fun can and does begin.

It is that one burning question that remains: “How can you still look your children in the eye” that continues to drive Reid each and every morning to hop out of bed and head straight for the couch.

MOST RECENT POSTS

FAQ

WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT FROM REID's writing

Stephen King wrote that a bad writer can become a good one, but a good writer will never become a great one. I can't begin to tell you how much pressure that took off me, and how many insulting rejection letters I've avoided by taking Mr. King's words to heart.

Still the path from being a bad writer to a good one remains long and winding, and I continue to experience night sweats over the next piece I pen proving that I am the fraud I've always feared myself to be.

To roll your eyes
-- at his oblivious tendencies.

To smirk
-- at the trajectory of his stubborn man mind.

To laugh
-- at his propensity to speak the quiet parts of life out loud.

To unwind
-- thanks to the experience & enjoyment of shared humor.

Fatalism and dystopia are the two positive driving forces in my writing. Throughout my writing life those forces have kept me on the narrow path of avoiding positivity, cheerfulness and a sunny disposition. After all, if you always expect the worst, you can never be disappointed. When you read my work, just keep in mind it will probably prove to be the low point of your day. That's something to look forward to, right?

A writer for more than 35 years, Reid, like Joyce, has sought to show the mundane and ordinary as unique and extraordinary as a way of justifying a life lived. Unlike Joyce, he has not portrayed that life with either adventure or energy as a driving force, mainly because of the level of effort that would have entailed. Now in his 70s, Reid is enjoying a time in life when slowing down and resting frequently is generally accepted as the best that can be expected. His beloved wife and travel companion Carol begs to differ, and that is another area where the fun can and does begin.

It is that one burning question that remains: “How can you still look your children in the eye” that continues to drive Reid each and every morning to hop out of bed and head straight for the couch.


Who told you you could write?
Actually it was a high school English teacher that told me I couldn't write. I admired him greatly, and spent the next fifty years or so striving to prove him right.

Do you really know what 'eponymous' means, or did you have to look it up before you used it in your recent blog?
What does eponymous mean?

Who has the right-of-way at a four-way stop?
I get these all the time. I think they're from people who want to show I really don't know everything after all. It could also be from people trying to cheat on their driving test. I always reply that they should stay 60 feet from any fire hydrant. Just to mess with them.

Is it pronounced pan.a.SEE.ah or pa.NAS.ee.ah?
Depends on where you're from. If you're from New York, you say it the first way. If you're from Alabama, you say it the second way, and then you get punched in the mouth for saying it at all.

Where are you on the Oxford comma?
I'll tell you, that, in my view, there should be more commas in this world, because a comma is,like, telling you to stop and smell the flowers, which we don't do enough, in our lives, you know, what I mean? So again, stop and smell the roses, the flowers and anything else along the way. Got it?

Do you ever get writers' block?
The only time I don't have writers' block is when I'm writing. The rest of my life is one big writers' block, however.

Are you allowed to pass a school bus stopped on the opposite side of a divided roadway?
Is this you again? Did you flunk last time? Was it the 60 ft. from a hydrant answer?  Okay. Here it
is. You can never pass a school bus, even when it's parked in the bus garage. Good luck!

Could you tell me how Molly Bloom's punctuationless monologue near the end of James Joyce's Ulysses functions as a rant against the Oxford comma? Say 1500 words, double spaced, by tomorrow?
You're getting a big fat F mister.

FAQ

Who told you you could write?
Actually it was a high school English teacher that told me I couldn't write. I admired him greatly, and spent the next fifty years or so striving to prove him right.

Do you really know what 'eponymous' means, or did you have to look it up before you used it in your recent blog?
What does eponymous mean?

Who has the right-of-way at a four-way stop?
I get these all the time. I think they're from people who want to show I really don't know everything after all. It could also be from people trying to cheat on their driving test. I always reply that they should stay 60 feet from any fire hydrant. Just to mess with them.

Is it pronounced pan.a.SEE.ah or pa.NAS.ee.ah?
Depends on where you're from. If you're from New York, you say it the first way. If you're from Alabama, you say it the second way, and then you get punched in the mouth for saying it at all.

Where are you on the Oxford comma?
I'll tell you, that, in my view, there should be more commas in this world, because a comma is,like, telling you to stop and smell the flowers, which we don't do enough, in our lives, you know, what I mean? So again, stop and smell the roses, the flowers and anything else along the way. Got it?

Do you ever get writers' block?
The only time I don't have writers' block is when I'm writing. The rest of my life is one big writers' block, however.

Are you allowed to pass a school bus stopped on the opposite side of a divided roadway?
Is this you again? Did you flunk last time? Was it the 60 ft. from a hydrant answer?  Okay. Here it is. You can never pass a school bus, even when it's parked in the bus garage. Good luck!

Could you tell me how Molly Bloom's punctuationless monologue near the end of James Joyce's Ulysses functions as a rant against the Oxford comma? Say 1500 words, double spaced, by tomorrow?
You're getting a big fat F mister.

FAQ

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an american walkabout

A journey of innocence, naivete, overreach and magoo-like self-discovery.

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Beginning with his fourth grade teacher, Sister Rottweiler (as he believes her name was), to having to write "tea" or "coffee"" on a slip of paper so his English ship captain could tell what he had brewed for him, Reid Champagne, a great American humorist and author has been distilling his mostly unrealized life through a fractured lens of mordant absurdity, sophomoric verbosity and self-actualizing deprecation. Most writers count words; Reid, ever the anal-retentive, counts syllables. Ha!  

His never-ending search for humor and the amusing, slice-of-life anecdote is what keeps him occupied these days. And when he finds what he's looking for, he vows to stop. Which probably explains why he's still going strong.

A writer for more than 35 years, Reid, like Joyce, has sought to show the mundane and ordinary as unique and extraordinary as a way of justifying a life lived. Unlike Joyce, he has not portrayed that life with either adventure or energy as a driving force, mainly because of the level of effort that would have entailed. Now in his 70s, Reid is enjoying a time in life when slowing down and resting frequently is generally accepted as the best that can be expected. His beloved wife and travel companion Carol begs to differ, and that is another area where the fun can and does begin. She is constantly pushing him to pursue his writing and humor; if Carol believes her husband is the top humorist in America, she'd be right. Reid has proven he can take on some of the funniest comedians and college humorists without breaking a sweat. His humor column and blog have become widely popular with travel enthusiasts and people looking for a good laugh. They are an excellent way to enjoy a retirement trip.

It is that one burning question that remains: "How can you still look your children in the eye"that continues to drive Reid each and every morning to hop out of bed and head straight for the couch.

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Interested in contacting Reid or reprinting or syndicating any of his writings, please leave a message and let's hope you get a response.

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